Driving record
Sunday, May 11, 2008
♥
-1:38 AM
Theres alot to be said and alot to be done lets just get started shall we?
i cant believe i had to be reduce to such a lowly stat where i have to express myself full in a post.
Today is the 10th day that i'm meeting baby girl.Yes.
meeting her is awesome but losing her is equally devastating.
well,Something that can make you so happy can make you so sad too yeah?
dont be mistaken people,i didnt quarrel,argue or break up with lydia.
This kind of scene is (i myself dunno how to explain)
Theres this awful feeling that i wish to get it off my chest.
Very long ago,when me and lydia just started off.I told her that i'm the kind of person who will
certainly win in a cold war because i just cant be bothered.If you want me than find me if not than forget it.
There isnt a point in my life that i lost a cold war before untill you....
What i want is seriously very simple.I want everyone around me to be happy,that is why i am always saying retarded stuffs,doing retarded things to make people laugh.Its not that i am retarded.Its just the feeling when you make someone laugh,it gives you the feel that you're making a difference,you're making another person's life happy.
That is the feeling that i was managing the whole 17 years of my life.
I know i was never selfish and that i am always putting other before my own.
that is something good yeah?but still it brings a joy in my life.
The boys home is a place where scums of this singapore meet and gather.I dare to say that there isnt even a person with good charactor inside.
Somehow,i didnt get any good traits inside but i accidentally jerk a few out.
And one of them include being selfish.
The moment i step out of boys home,i realised the kind of attitude that i brought out.
Everything is for myself.
Everything is doing harm to others and gaining the things i want.
I didnt like that part of me so i revert back my old self.
I am successful.The joy of helping others just come running back to me and once again i am jj.
Being my girl friend,as in a serious girl friend who i put in ligit feelings is somewhat impossible but i manage.
I did manage to find lydia liao who fits the description of everything i want in a girl.
I dunno how to explain what is so special about her but yes she is indeed the one i will give up everything for.
And i did.
tiny whiny bad habits of mine,as long as i think it will cause the depreciation of our relationship,i will kick the habit away.
This thing about being someone you're not.Peharps i was full of bad habits anyway.
But i like being caring.I like being someone who they know they can depend on me.
The reason why i let myself lose in the cold war and makes the first move is just because i wanna let you know i care.I am serious about you.I am not just another 4 month relationship that you had.
Simple small little thing like sending you home,oh i'm one of the few who sends you all the way home?you feel really bad.
BABY love is neutral.
The reason why i even can find the drive to send you home after a wonderful day because the day wont be wonderful w/o you and the kind of feeling that you give to me makes me feel like i'm already asended to heaven.
No one can ever give me this happiness.No one ever will.
That is why you can rest assure that i will not cheat on you because why would i?
Flowers wither and all that is remain is the stalk which is useless without the flower head.
Have you ever wondered what kind of happiness the flower gave to you when its from the person you love the most?
The wonderful feeling that the flower gave to you before it wither?
If a flower can give you this feeling;when the flower wither i'll make sure i buy you another bouquet.
isnt it just that simple baby?
if beautiful relationships like us can give you such unfathomable happiness;when the feeling is fading i'll make sure that none of us give up and renew the feeling.Because i know that this relationship/flower had given me happiness before and the happiness is so great that i dont wanna lose it.
There isnt a point when i regretted loving you.
There isnt a thing that i regretted doing with you.
All i regretted is not to treat you better.
That is why i always allow myself to be reduced to a little boy without any pride.
Because after all what is pride when i can see a smile on your face?
When you're happy,i am happy.
I just hope that i will not be taken for granted.
i cant believe i had to be reduce to such a lowly stat where i have to express myself full in a post.
Today is the 10th day that i'm meeting baby girl.Yes.
meeting her is awesome but losing her is equally devastating.
well,Something that can make you so happy can make you so sad too yeah?
dont be mistaken people,i didnt quarrel,argue or break up with lydia.
This kind of scene is (i myself dunno how to explain)
Theres this awful feeling that i wish to get it off my chest.
Very long ago,when me and lydia just started off.I told her that i'm the kind of person who will
certainly win in a cold war because i just cant be bothered.If you want me than find me if not than forget it.
There isnt a point in my life that i lost a cold war before untill you....
What i want is seriously very simple.I want everyone around me to be happy,that is why i am always saying retarded stuffs,doing retarded things to make people laugh.Its not that i am retarded.Its just the feeling when you make someone laugh,it gives you the feel that you're making a difference,you're making another person's life happy.
That is the feeling that i was managing the whole 17 years of my life.
I know i was never selfish and that i am always putting other before my own.
that is something good yeah?but still it brings a joy in my life.
The boys home is a place where scums of this singapore meet and gather.I dare to say that there isnt even a person with good charactor inside.
Somehow,i didnt get any good traits inside but i accidentally jerk a few out.
And one of them include being selfish.
The moment i step out of boys home,i realised the kind of attitude that i brought out.
Everything is for myself.
Everything is doing harm to others and gaining the things i want.
I didnt like that part of me so i revert back my old self.
I am successful.The joy of helping others just come running back to me and once again i am jj.
Being my girl friend,as in a serious girl friend who i put in ligit feelings is somewhat impossible but i manage.
I did manage to find lydia liao who fits the description of everything i want in a girl.
I dunno how to explain what is so special about her but yes she is indeed the one i will give up everything for.
And i did.
tiny whiny bad habits of mine,as long as i think it will cause the depreciation of our relationship,i will kick the habit away.
This thing about being someone you're not.Peharps i was full of bad habits anyway.
But i like being caring.I like being someone who they know they can depend on me.
The reason why i let myself lose in the cold war and makes the first move is just because i wanna let you know i care.I am serious about you.I am not just another 4 month relationship that you had.
Simple small little thing like sending you home,oh i'm one of the few who sends you all the way home?you feel really bad.
BABY love is neutral.
The reason why i even can find the drive to send you home after a wonderful day because the day wont be wonderful w/o you and the kind of feeling that you give to me makes me feel like i'm already asended to heaven.
No one can ever give me this happiness.No one ever will.
That is why you can rest assure that i will not cheat on you because why would i?
Flowers wither and all that is remain is the stalk which is useless without the flower head.
Have you ever wondered what kind of happiness the flower gave to you when its from the person you love the most?
The wonderful feeling that the flower gave to you before it wither?
If a flower can give you this feeling;when the flower wither i'll make sure i buy you another bouquet.
isnt it just that simple baby?
if beautiful relationships like us can give you such unfathomable happiness;when the feeling is fading i'll make sure that none of us give up and renew the feeling.Because i know that this relationship/flower had given me happiness before and the happiness is so great that i dont wanna lose it.
There isnt a point when i regretted loving you.
There isnt a thing that i regretted doing with you.
All i regretted is not to treat you better.
That is why i always allow myself to be reduced to a little boy without any pride.
Because after all what is pride when i can see a smile on your face?
When you're happy,i am happy.
I just hope that i will not be taken for granted.
XOXO
Sad/happy/angry/me?
Sad/happy/angry/me?