Driving record
  • May 2007♥
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  • July 2007♥
  • February 2008♥
  • March 2008♥
  • April 2008♥
  • May 2008♥
  • June 2008♥
  • July 2008♥
  • August 2008♥
  • September 2008♥
  • October 2008♥
  • November 2008♥
  • December 2008♥
  • January 2009♥


  • Wednesday, September 10, 2008
    -9:48 PM

    Sorry seems to be the hardest word but someone's got to say it.

    Another event which trigger another reflection for the recent spate of events.
    Peharps the only common mistake that we humans make is to take things for total granted.
    One great example is my life,
    I was always blessed with the best things,people but what i realised is that i can never hold them tight
    and cherish them like i'm suppose to.

    My mother,
    She once told me that among all the three kids that she have,i am the only one that she love the most,not for the fact that i'm the oldest child but because i was the first child that she first started as a mother.
    Even as a baby,i was a problem child.
    She entered difficult labour as i was too huge for natural birth and when i was due for labour,
    the doctor told my mother that if she were to insist giving birth to me,there will be a chance that we will both die.
    My mother chose to give birth to me and by the grace of god, we are both fine.
    But that was only the first tribulation.

    She insisted that i was put into a prestigious or rather a well-to-do school among all the other neighbour schools hoping that i will grow up to be a fine young man.
    But things didnt go her way and i didnt turn out to be as normal as others did.
    I was rebellious,insolence and worst of all,i gave no regard to the law.

    Tons and tons of things happened and eventually i was put into solitary,
    this broke her heart into a million pieces but still she didnt give up on me.
    With her insessant encouragement,17 years of age,i am indeed a better person.
    But i still didnt fulfill my role as a fillial child.
    Governed by mood,i shout at her,refuse to comply and even say things which hurt her from the deepest isle of her heart.
    (i have no idea why i'm blogging like this,my english cant seem go smoothly as usual and actually fixing the bit and pieces of thoughts lingering in my head.)

    Lydia,
    i left school early this morning in order to cook up a surprise for her because she voluteered to come over to my house to baby-sit my younger brothers and i think its really sweet of her.
    Cabbed home,bathed and hid under the bed anticipating her return from fetching jun hui.
    In the process of providing hints to uncover that actually i was hiding under the bed,i heard many conversations with her and brother,at that instance i then realised how blissful i was.
    Being blessed with a gf which not only love me to ends of the gritted bones,she love my family as well.Her conversation with junhui (w/o the knowledge that i was actually listening) just let me feel that i was the most happiest man on earth because my Gf is such an angel.
    The kind of conversation that they hold,junhui most probably treat lydia as an older sister when he can confide to her and even disturb her knowing that she will not be angry.
    And in order to achieve that kind of relationship with someone,it definetely takes alot.
    And the absolute fact that its happening,it just made me feel that this special someone is indeed you.When you soo happily took those NTUC Vounchers and gave it to my mother,i really felt my heart melting because my gf have such a heart for my mother.
    I really wish to tell you how warm i feel inside and how happy i am being yours.
    The little conversation which stuck,when junhui accidentally murmumed out that you bought those choc babies for me,i melted.

    All these thoughts occur to me when a little squabble broke out between us today.
    I am really a lucky person by having all this but why is it that never seem to cherish them?
    I've learned my mistake.
    Dont be mistaken,We are fine now send her a text and she forgave me big-heartedly.
    But i will not take this for granted.
    From now on,things wont come easy and you,Lydia, didnt come easy as well.
    I am really a very lucky person and i will do anything to hold on to all this things close to my heart.
    Words cant explain the feeling that i'm feeling now.
    So, pardon me for this shitty piece of unorganised chunk.

    ---

    I'm staring out into the night
    Trying to hide the pain
    I'm going to the place where love
    And feeling good don't ever cost a thing
    And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain

    Well I'm going home
    Back to the place where I belong
    And where your love has always been enough for me
    I'm not running from
    No, I think you got me all wrong
    I don't regret this life
    I chose for me
    But these places and these faces are getting old
    So I'm going home
    Well I'm going home

    The miles are getting longer, it seems
    The closer I get to you
    I've not always been the best man for you
    But your love remains true
    And I don't know why
    You always seem to give me another try
    -
    When you see this baby,do know that i'm really sorry and i love you.
    You're more than one in a million,you one and only.
    I love you.


    XOXO
    Sad/happy/angry/me?

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